I’ve been preparing for August’s podcast on Happiness. Researching the topic, I discovered I have far too many books on the topic than I realized.  Who collects happiness books? Was I really that unhappy at some point that I thought I would find the answers in the books I splurged on? Perhaps. I don’t know. Yet as I go through the books and the notes I’ve scribbled about happiness, I’m struck by the number of suggestions I have incorporated in my life and surprised at the ones that got away.

Since my life changed dramatically within the last 5 years, I’ve had to re-prioritize my focus. Of the suggestions that got away, one related to doing something you love. Writing has always been a pleasure of mine, yet not something I consistently did due to fear.  Fear of the unknown, fear of what people would think, fear of what people would assume, interpret, project, and many other reasons.  Yet, collecting information for the presentation, I realized I was looking for proof that it would be okay. What I discovered, however, was that how to be happy is not complicated, as there is much research on this. There are 100’s of ways to shift our perception and experience to become happier. What is complicated is stepping out of our comfort zone.

Writing for myself is a comfort zone. I don’t worry about what others will think or say or how they might critique my words or punctuation (the comma is my enemy, I’ve discovered, it challenges me in oh, so many ways). Yet writing to publish, whether a blog (yes, I get the irony here), a short story, or a novel, puts a lot more of myself out there, and most days the ambivalence of comfort and risk swings on that pendulum. Yet I know (intuitively, rationally, or both) there is something about putting thought to paper (or screen), sharing experiences, and unfolding wisdom (individual and collective) that has allowed me to push past the critic committee in my mind that slows my progress. I write because it is something I have always wanted to do, something I have done in bits and pieces throughout my life. Lately, I’ve also been exploring what I may want to do in the next chapter of my life, after a professional career where I’ve accomplished everything on my list (except the TED talk and creating a legacy).  I realized, however, that writing may very well be that legacy.

The wealth of information and wisdom from my professional path and lived experience alchemized in a way I never imagined, and a story emerged.  Sharing what I know from my professional life compounds this. I could not ask for something more aligned than the blend of knowledge and experience.  Happiness cemented itself in a way I cannot describe, yet know it will never escape. As long as I write daily, weekly, or monthly, happiness will not be as elusive as I once considered it to be.